My husband died in 2020. He was 54, two (2) months away from his 55th birthday. I was a widow at 55 years old. I thought I was used to it as he was a sailor since 1991 and I have been an overseas Filipino worker since December 2005. There were many times when we felt like strangers to each other. It is normal. Every relationship must be a work in progress, day in, day out. There were many challenges along the way, but for me, keeping the marriage intact no matter what happens is a must, because of our children. Since his death until now, things have not completely sunk in to my inner core yet.
The journey of widowhood is a path that brings forth a range of emotions, challenges, and transformations. There are times when I feel very down and lonely, imagining of a happy married life with someone who is on the same page with me, with same wavelengths, or at least, same love for life, peace and harmony.
As I see some ordinary women with their own individual weaknesses, they look very strong with responsible and caring husbands who are good protectors and providers. They are well taken care of, respected and loved. This has a contagion effect.
Across various cultures and histories, initiatives have emerged to uplift and support widows, ensuring they find strength in their vulnerability.
In the Holy Bible, Ruth 1 NIV, the story of Ruth and Naomi stands as a poignant example of support for widows. Ruth's dedication to her widowed mother-in-law, Naomi, is a testament to the bond and responsibility that extends beyond blood ties. This narrative teaches us that caring for widows transcends mere duty—it's a heartfelt commitment to standing by those who have lost their life partners.
Many countries and communities have recognized the unique challenges widows face and have introduced various initiatives to provide support. From counseling services to financial aid, these programs aim to help widows rebuild their lives. Organizations like the "Widows Empowerment Trust" and "Widows for Peace through Democracy" globally are passionately engaged in advocating for the rights and well-being of widows.
Widowhood is not just a journey of loss—it's also an opportunity for personal growth and empowerment.
While the pain of losing a partner is profound, it can serve as a catalyst for self-discovery and inner strength. To embark on this journey, widows should courageously move forward. Engaging in activities that bring joy, learning new skills, and pursuing passions can help fill the void with a renewed sense of purpose.
Here are the steps for widows to move forward --
1. Seek support: Reach out to friends, family, support groups, or counseling services. Grief shared is grief eased.
2. Rediscover identity: Reconnect with who you are outside of your role as a partner. Embrace hobbies and activities that ignite your passions.
3. Financial empowerment: Educate yourself about your financial situation. Take steps to secure your future, whether through savings, investments, or seeking professional advice.
4. Lifelong learning: Continue to learn and grow. Enroll in courses, workshops, or pursue interests you've always wanted to explore.
5. Community involvement: Engage with your community. Volunteering and giving back can offer a sense of purpose and connection.
The journey of a widow is a testament to the resilience of the human spirit.
By drawing inspiration from both ancient wisdom and modern initiatives, widows can find solace in knowing that they (we) are not alone.
Embracing their (our) individuality, seeking support, and bravely moving forward, widows can rebuild their (our) lives with newfound strength and purpose.
As they (we) navigate through grief, let them (us) remember that the same heart that aches from loss also has the capacity to overflow with newfound joy and resilience.
Kahlil Gibran has this inspiring quotation, and this I will passionately magnify in my mind to mend my broken heart --
The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.
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Image credits: Pixabay | Kellepics
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