Skip to main content

Generativity as Our Legacy


Have you experienced stagnation when you feel that you are stuck somewhere for some time due to reason/s beyond control? You feel like you were a tree that cannot move from where you are then you think that tree is better -- it grows, it gives shadows thru its leaves and foods from fruits.

This is felt when you are in the middle age, between 40 to 64 years old, when you feel that your body is not as strong as before. But as a saying goes, "Life begins at 40." 

I belong to that middle-aged group. My children told me to take a rest at home but I have missed a lot of opportunities while rising to some personal challenges for my family members to get through in the past. I want to do more in my remaining life on earth. I know the 'Big Why' and I am chasing it, whatever it takes, no matter how long it takes.

Our life here on earth is limited. The doctor who attended to my father while he was fighting for his life told me that the average lifespan is 65 years old those days, 2008, and his three (3) years was a bonus already. He was to stop the medical devices which extended the life of my vegetating father, with my brother's request to explain things to me in a more practical and scientific way, as up to the last minute I wanted him to stay longer with us.

It is said that with the modern discoveries and inventions thru new technology, the lifespan will be 100 years in the near future. So if you do the calculation, plus 40 minus 40, middle age would be between 40 to 60 years old.

Sometimes other people do not understand those who experience midlife crisis. According to Wikipedia, the term was coined by Elliot Jaques in 1965. It is a phenomenon, a psychological crisis which occurs in middle-aged individuals typically 45-64 years old. One feels depressed and there are anxiety attacks. There is a great desire to look and feel young again and to make drastic changes to the current lifestyle.

I experience this. I feel this. I accept the fact that I have some shortcomings of accomplishments in life, but at the same time, I embrace the truth that while I breathe there is hope that I can still accomplish something and leave a legacy when I am no longer here.


Inside me, there is a loud shout for generativity. When I watch the videos and look at the pictures of my children and grandchildren, the more I realize the need to have that strong mindset to nurture and guide younger people and be of help to the next generation.

Psychoanalyst Erik Erikson coined the term 'generativity' in 1950, per Wikipedia, to denote "a concern for establishing and guiding the next generation."  He accordingly first used the term while defining the Care stage in the theory of the stages of psychosocial development.

My first-born son is 30 years old. I was very happy when he told me that after receiving his salaries he found a way to share some foods with some homeless people. He gets free healthy meals from his company so somehow he does not spend for his foods on workdays. He faces his own storms but despite that, he can make his life count thru some little ways.

We see many people doing the volunteering work, mentoring, consulting, and whatever good for other people and future generations -- mostly for free and with inner joy, which you can feel. So it is about generative self, with generative concern, setting some concrete goals, taking swift actions, to care for, nurture and lead others particularly the next generations. Generativity itself is a legacy.

I am not rich in material things, but I want to passionately mark my life with philanthropic works.

Help me, God, to stay strong and in faith.  Please fill my cup abundantly with Your blessings.

---

Photo credits:  Pixabay

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

"Wasting of Women's Talents Must Cease"

Here I am in a four-cornered room, thinking of many things that I can do considering my talents, but I cannot utilize to the fullest due to some obstacles which are not just in the mind but real. I am woman -- I know I have a power inside me yet I feel vulnerable. There is an interesting article published in Gulf News, "In the Middle East, Momentum for Women Must Pick Up Speed" written by Shaikh Abdullah Bin Zayed Al Nahyan, dated 31 May 2018. Very timely, indeed, that I saw this article few minutes back. I am inspired to read similar write-ups promoting advocacy on importance of empowering women by giving them solid support. Can we quantify wasted women's talents? Maybe we can in terms of lost opportunities. Or can we enumerate wasted women's talents if we cannot quantify them? There are women who are full-time mothers and housewives, either by choice or by tradition or both. We know that being so is indeed a tiring unpaid job for many women. For some they ...

Of Ginger-Lemon Water, and A/C Off

  And so I am now again drinking a lot of hot lemon tea with ginger. It will help improve my health immunity .  WebMD.com says, " Lemon is a rich source of vitamin C and antioxidants, which both have immunity-boosting properties. Ginger also has immunity-boosting properties and can guard against some bacteria." Am coughing when my back is sweating. The air conditioner is switched off again. If you are in the Gulf area, even if it is December it is still hot. There are times when it is even hotter inside my partitioned room with a window facing the sun, no building near ours to block the scorching heat -- than the actual temperature outside. I have a temperature app in my mobile phone and I regularly check it. When I switch on the air conditioner, somebody else switches it off. (I remember when we transferred to the our previous flat and I was told that the A/C was centralized, 24/7 on. I was grateful because the heat of human bodies, the lights, their gadgets -- laptops and m...

'Hotelcation' and More

My youngest daughter surprised me with the good news that she was allowed to go on Eid vacation for some days. She badly needed rest and relaxation for a work-life balance. It was very hot here in the UAE when we got blissfully reunited at 2 PM.  It was Eid so most hotels nearby were either fully booked, or if not, their room rate boards showed AED800/day +/-. My frugal daughter stepped back when she saw 'towering' figures. A I watched my Buninay eating halohalo in our meeting place, a restaurant serving Filipino foods, I held my tears back. She ordered 'mixed-with-everything' fried rice, grilled squid and  kinilaw  (raw fish with vinegar, chili and chopped onions).  Memories of her childhood flooded in my mind. How time flies! My then-baby-who-is-now-a-lady wanted to spoil me. Felt truly blessed beyond words. We hopped to Seattle's Best in the mall near the mosque. While indulging myself with my favorite Cinnabon bites and strawberry smoothies, and my ol...