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Just Be Happy


"Just be happy" is indeed a very moving line. Whatever our circumstance in life is,  for now just be happy as an innocent child who knows nothing about the cruel world. As Guillaume Apollinaire once said, "Now and then it's good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy."

When I was young, my mother and I regularly went to church. The words of the priests echoed repeatedly in my mind, "Comfort those in sorrow" as I sat down.  I did not have any idea about the true meaning of sorrow because I had loving parents and brother who made me feel loved. That time, lacking in material things would not make me sad -- as long as after a day's work in her dress shop, my mother would come home at night on weekdays and on Sundays she'd cook something special for all of us.

I spent my Saturdays in my mother's dress shop or in some places in the locality with many trees which my friends, relatives and I climbed. My favorites were mango and guava trees especially when there were fruits. I would pick up many of them which I put in my pocket, bag, folded dress or tucked in top or just threw them down to be gathered later.  What a joy to pick up many fruits altogether in a stem! I loved climbing up and up -- proud that I managed to carefully choose the right branches to step on with bare feet or hold tightly, without falling down and breaking my bones.

Nowadays most of the children do not experience this. They are glued to their gadgets. Besides, many  agricultural lands have been developed to residential places -- if that is what development is all about.

When was the last time you got happy? Unhappy? We feel unhappy when we lack meaning and purpose in our lives. That is when we feel a big vacuum inside us.

Many researches and studies, formal and informal, have been done to discover the formula and algorithms for happiness. Others express it in recipe by mixing what they think are the right ingredients for happiness.

Happiness is a choice. Choosing something is a process which is done in the mind. So happiness is in the mind. But why is it that despite the fact that we can dictate our minds to be happy, we cannot order the brains to shut down and be numb to sadness, even for little things, minor or no-sense things?

In the UAE there is Happiness Ministry -- and this is exactly what the government wants the residents and visitors to be -- be happy. Happy people means healthy people. Healthy people are a nation's wealth. So a country is wealthy if it has happy people. Here about 90% are expatriates and most of them are away from their families. It really matters to know and experience happiness even when away from loved ones.

If you were to create a special committee to oversee the happiness of the people, what will you do? I think the best is to ask them directly if they are happy or not, and if not ask how they can be happy -- with the option to respond in confidence.

Every individual has his own view of happiness and yardstick to measure it. No digital barometer can exactly gauge this. We learn more about happiness from unhappy people as they know best what will make them happy in the same way that a doctor best learns from different cases of patients' illnesses he has handled.

"Happy?" I remember my previous boss asked me this.  "What's bothering you?" My former editor-in-chief  used to ask me this when I was the college publication news editor during my silent moments. They cared to ask me if I was happy or if something bothered me that made me unhappy. These lines breathed life to a lonely soul.

We tend to say "I am happy" or "I am fine" even if we are not so it is 'period' (.) and no more question asked. That is fine. But it is finer to say the truth to a trusted person -- that we are not happy or we are not fine, if needed. It is finest not to be in denial if something goes wrong, and to do something to fix it.

One of the problems in today's society is we are advised to avoid 'toxic' people so as not to transfer the negativity they have to us. So if those who we think are 'toxic' people just because they are not happy nor fine, are left isolated let alone suffer from depression, then there will be more negative ripples not only affecting them but also their families and people surrounding them.

I wish I studied neuroscience, psychology and social services. I had a psychology subject (minor) in college and I got a grade of flat 1.0, which showed my great passion in it. But it's not too late. Someday, somehow I will learn more on neuroscience which I think is hugely interesting!

With what I have (not money nor things that it can buy), where I am (not a comfort zone), what I am (warrior) and who I am (simply M), I will passionately manifest happiness every single day of my life. I commit to share more of myself to find more meaning in the very essence of the word 'happiness' -- which according to Aristotle, must be the AE of human existence. Aim and end. 

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Photo credits: Pixabay

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